Are you Being Served? Touche!

Sometimes someone gets it...

You: Hello!
Stranger: i have a wet pussy
You: Well, get a towel and dry the poor dear off! Cats hate water, you know.
Stranger: i shall, poor kitty shouldn't of left him out in the rain like that

Convo went on for a bit about the merits of British comedy but sometimes, someone can get one up on me. :)

Sunshine Farts

Stranger: i hate this
You: I'm sorry.
You: there should be an "x" at the top of your browser.
Stranger: yes i am well aware
You: Click on that, and it will close the window!
You: Then, you don't have stew in your hate/negative vibes
You: *sunshine rainbows*
Stranger: damn you are all about that!
Stranger: lovin that positive attitude!
You: woo! Thank you.
You: Trying to make a difference.
You: For the Omegle Losers of the world.
You: Oh God. i'm going to kill myself.
You: THANKS FOR BRINGING ME DOWN.
Stranger: my b

Thanks for the potatoes, Jesus.

Stranger: hi
You: Hello
You: Hello
You: potatoes
You: are delicious
Stranger: chips
You: yes
Stranger: yep sure are
You: that is one of the many variations of deliciousocity that potatoes can occupy
Stranger: good for u
You: who dug up a potato and said "this looks delicious. I'm going to bake this and put some butter and sour cream on it"?
You: because it just looks like a dirt clod
Stranger: jesus?
You: probably
You: and then they had some wine
You: from water
You: good job Jesus.
Stranger: yer true
You: thanks for dying for our sins AND giving us baked potatoes.
Stranger: yer wat a mad guy
You: *high five*

Variations on a theme

Same thing, 10 minutes later. Funnier somehow.

You: Hello!
Stranger: hi
You: you look sullen
Stranger: what?
You: you heard me.
You: you look sullen.
You: "hi"
You: like you can't be bothered to throw in an exclamation point or even a capital "H"
You: makes me feel unwanted.
You: Do you think about how your actions make others feel?

Alive, alert, awake and enthusiastic!

You: Hello!
Stranger: hey
You: So enthusiastic!
Stranger: i know
You: very emo.
You: do you need someone to move the hair out of your eyes?
Stranger: i worked for 16 hours, im exhasted
You: To tired to capitalize, I see.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The Terminator

This probably isn't as funny to anyone else as it is to me but I am absolutely terrified of a "sky net" situation and have nightmares about it fairly regularly.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
Stranger: cyber?
You: SKY NET!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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